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Angel Hunt and Streifen Roleplay
+ Alternate Universe 01 +
C H A P T E R O N E : P A R T 11
However, Sashi can’t help but to draw the similarities between the things that Lan reveals and his own experiences. The masks to hide away true selves—from others as well as themselves—to keep unwanted realities from sight, he understands that quite well. Lan keeps it all in place to divert the stares and looks of pity… disgust… disbelief, closing it away just as he does. Like the other teenager, he doesn’t always like what he sees beneath the mask either. It’s getting harder to recall a time when he wasn’t buried beneath the defenses, when keeping them in place wasn’t automatic. Sometimes he’s afraid that there isn’t anything left under there anymore and the masks are the only thing he has left… Then there’s the magic, a force that the Bright fights for control over just as he does. If unleashed destruction will follow so it’s necessary to keep it locked down, reined in, restricted behind barriers even while it fights and even when the cost to one’s self is high. He may not carry the visible scars from the battles that Lan does, but they’re inside, etched just a little deeper with each loss of control.
So the third year knows what it’s all like, he understands the constant battles waged each day, but does it matter? The telepath has never met anyone else who could understand, but Lan’s experiences, what difference do they make? They won’t change anything or magically make all the hurt, old and new, go away, so there’s no point in hoping that it will. Hope is something he gave up on a long time ago anyway…
Chocolate brown eyes calmly hold gray and it takes some effort for Sashi to pull his gaze down to the last bit of cigarette smoldering between his fingers. He doesn’t want an apology; he doesn’t want a thank you, he just wants… The slender stick lifts to full lips and he pulls the smoke deep inside, holding it for a long moment. He wants Lan to be all right. The fact strikes hard as true, resonating so loudly that for the space of a heartbeat it becomes difficult to make any other clear thoughts. Smoke clouds the air as he frees it and a soft frown settles over tanned features. This whole thing is some of the stupidest shit he’s ever done. He knows better, knows much fucking better than to allow himself the same kind of luxuries that others take for granted. When the Bright goes back to ignoring him, to keeping the distance that they’ve maintained for two years, he’ll be the one who gets hurt. Another mark atop all the others, another sharp wire to bind him even tighter…
The slight shift of the one seated at his feet redirects Sashi’s attention, the look he’s being given expectant yet patient in the lapse of conversation. “I just happened to be nearby,” the Dark says again, his voice so quiet that even in the stillness of the room it’s difficult to hear. “I didn’t do anything special; I just gave you the medication that was on the floor.” The cigarette disappears before burning out and he crosses his arm around his waist, absently hugging himself a little tighter. Questions slip through his mind, things he should be asking to further his assignment and round out the reports, but he’d promised a respect for secrets and he means to honor it. Lan may not consider his word to be of value given his faction, but the telepath has no intention on invading the other student’s privacy. Sashi watches for a moment as tendrils of smoke rise from the end of the remaining cigarette, the path toward the Bright’s mouth highlighted in glowing red, trailing afterimages in the darkened room. “I know what it is to fight the magic… to wake up in the morning and wonder if this is the day you’ll lose control and destroy everything.” The words are sliding out before he fully grasps it, tumbling out and avoiding all attempts at being silenced. “Friday night… I lost the fight…” His storm-tinted gaze lifts to meet illusionary brown, held by a force he still can’t comprehend. “So I understand… and you don’t need to apologize…”
Lan: he nods only a little as he pulls the last of his cigarette to his mouth, inhaling the final remnants of what he holds deep into his lungs. He… had thought as much after Sashi had basically collapsed in his arms on Friday, that something big had happened to the other teenager. Their conversation before the festival at that small café in town only cemented his suspicions that whatever had hurt Sashi had been something to do with his own body and had been something he’d lost control of.
He understands that all too well… losing control.
He never had the problem before he was given this assignment as previously, every day of his life had been pretty much the same. His magic had always been a co-existing part of him, nothing he had to think much on or assert himself over as it simply existed along with him. Then he came to this school, talked to the right people and found himself cast into a whole new world where he became the subject of experiments his own Assembly told him he simply had to accept. He walked away from those experiments changed, mutated, with a foreign force twisting what he’d always taken for granted and suddenly at a loss on how to keep it under any form of control. For the first time in his life, his magic and that of the kind forced on him controlled him instead of the other way around. For the first time in his life, he had no say in what his magic wanted to do, as if it had a mind of its own and that mind cared little for what he wished. Slipping the smoldering stick away and blowing the smoke out, he flicks the butt off to the side. No thought is lent to it as it turns to ash and none is given as that ash flickers into nothing just as it would hit to hardwood floor. Turning masked eyes up to meet thundercloud grey, Lan offers the telepath the smallest of reassuring smiles. “My offer… it still stands.” The lightest tinting of confusion shifts through tanned features and soon the tall Bright is rising up onto his feet, wincing just a little when the movements cause various injuries to spike beneath the surface of covered skin. “Since we both seem to have… issues, with control, I understand what it’s like to feel alone while that loss happens. But… you don’t have to be alone, Sashi… not anymore.” he explains as he reaches up to push at strands of shaggy black before he holds that same hand out for Sashi to take, the warmth in his features shining clear even in the darkness of the surrounding room. “The offer to accompany you during your ‘hikes’ to ensure you have someone there to catch you should you fall… it still stands. I’m little consolation I know but… trust me when I say that it’s easier to face these things with others who understand than it is to constantly stand on your own…”
Sashi: Gray eyes hold fast to the hand that’s stretched out for him to take, the words of the lanky third year sinking in simultaneously with the knowledge of what the offer before him really is. The illusion spell is visual only and just like that first day that their fingers accidentally brushed while exchanging the cigarette, he’ll be able to feel every scar, every imperfection that mars the Bright’s hand. He’d seen the damage up close earlier, but this is different. Lan is awake and freely offering for him to touch, to expose that piece of himself hidden behind the masks from others, something that was shared without choice before, but is now outstretched, waiting. Tied with the promises of company and understanding, like a very pretty gift, held out for him to take… But… there are reasons that he can’t have these things like other people, reasons that have been carved into him with words and weapons and blood for as long as he can remember. Reasons that deep inside, he knows are all too true. ‘Stained’, ‘dirty’, ‘monster’—these things keep him at a distance, pulled away to protect others as well as himself. The elders have been saying it for years, the whole faction has been saying it for years, and they’ve all made sure that the picture is very clear regarding their opinion of him. Lan doesn’t understand, he can’t possibly know what he’s truly offering and what it really entails. When the Bright’s control fails he has that medication and his girlfriend and his other friends to fall back on, whether they understand what’s happening or not. For Sashi there’s only his own strength and when it fails and the control is lost, there is no one to rely on and in the end, people are hurt. There can’t be any help because he doesn’t deserve help, not when it’s always his fault for losing it in the first place.
The nearly inaudible words are out even as the Dark pries himself from the chair, thundercloud eyes riveted to the floor. He needs to go back to his room, the place he should have been all night, where he should have returned after assuring the other Selestarri was all right. He doesn’t belong here, being thanked and apologized to, treated with kindness that’s given without clear understanding. If he goes back, he’ll be alone again and that’s how it’s supposed to be, how everyone has always told him it should be. There’s a coldness clamping down on his stomach, the familiarity of the distance he keeps between himself and others working to set into place even as the panic that’s lodged in his chest, the need to get out, to return to his room is screaming so loud and driving him forward.
There isn’t enough magic left to teleport and so battered legs pull Sashi up off the cushions only to fail at the first step, pain flaring hard through torn muscle and wrenching a small gasp from between full lips. The floor is rising up fast when long arms encircle his chest, pulling him in tight even as he stumbles. For a moment his entire weight is held by the Bright, his gaze finally lifting to meet illusionary brown, now so close. Confusion and fear reflect in chocolate depths, confirming everything that he’s always known to be true, that this is what he does to people, whether he’s trying to or not. With the barest shake of his head, the telepath jerks away. [Don’t… You can’t understand…] Each sentence he starts trails away before he can finish, lost in the battle between the panic and the distance that’s currently waging inside. […I’ll hurt you,] the raven-haired Dark finally gets out almost desperately before limping heavily toward the door. The pain streaking up from his leg dangerously turns his stomach, threatening to dump the contents even as he works to clear the locks, shaking fingers sliding the last latch free before twisting the knob.
Lan: the tall Bright can do nothing more than watch the other teen struggle his way out of his door, standing in silence while masked brown eyes stay riveted on Sashi’s limping form. He wants to help, the sight of the Dark’s trembling fingers, the way the slightest tinting of desperation had laced his words sticks with him even after his doorway is empty and the fourth year is gone.
But his feet are glued to the spot, his mind too focused in on the feelings of being almost shoved away and the hand he’d offered rejected… ignored. He’s been trying, hasn’t he? For the past week, something has been compelling him to speak with one of his race, an opposite side of his faction that he’d spent two years ignoring the same way he’d been ignored in return. He doesn’t know why… but something about the way Sashi looked at him that day caused him to break a silent truce and step over lines. Since then much has happened and every new thing that arises, only seems to pull him in closer. Perhaps it was a kindred spirit type deal, finding someone who just might understand what it feels like to be so locked up within yourself that you are completely alone even when standing in a room full of others. Every new talk and ‘chance’ encounter with the other Selestarri only seemed to confirm that fact and for the first time in a while, Lan had found himself intrigued.
But this was only his thoughts it seems and he’s pushed himself onto someone who doesn’t want him there. There will be no friendship and judging from the look in those gray tinted eyes, no more talks or encounters like before. Things… will most likely go back to what they had been before he’d asked for a cigarette that one school day.
It’s an unsettling thought, one that strikes him a little deeply. Almost as deeply as being pushed away.
Slowly, the Bright forces himself to move, taking soft steps through the darkness of his room and towards the door still opened before him. It takes a lot for the third year not to rush out after the Dark, and instead he compromises by waiting to close it completely in order to listen to the shuffling footfalls out in the hall. He waits until Sashi’s completely gone, waits until a door in the distance opens and closes to signal that he’s back in his own room, waits a few minutes longer before he finally slides his own shut as well.
Turning back to his empty room, the illusion spell flitters away as he leans back against his door while white shaggy strands shift down to cover summer colored eyes finding himself worn and upset for reasons he can’t really comprehend…
Zephyr: Students crowd the halls after the final bells of the day and the air rings with the sound of chatter and laughing. Between the doorways of two first-year classrooms, the tall Selestarri leans against the wall, a sleek black cell phone pressed against his ear. Long fingers rake through blonde bangs and he sighs audibly. “Right, just do what I asked, okay? It’s not rocket science…” He smiles at a group of kids who walk past and wave even though he’s not exactly sure what any of their names are. “Look, I’m sure that you have enough, you know, pull, with at least one of the record keepers to get them… It’s just a formality for me since my paperwork didn’t include one…” Midnight eyes roll toward the ceiling and the Dark frowns. “Thanks, I’m pretty well versed in what I can do with my abilities without you explaining it all out for me. Like I said, it’s a formality…” The frown deepens and Zeph drops his head back against the wall, somehow managing to stifle the groan of frustration that threatens to slip through full lips. “No, why would I not…? I already said that you can pick your reward at the next holiday that I’m home for…” God, why can’t she just shut up? “No, I need two, I’ll text you the info for the second one and you can use whatever’s on file for mine… Yeah, in Korean, aren’t you listening?”
After a moment, the Selestarri slides the phone closed, a wide smile slipping over his mouth as midnight eyes idly shift through the crowd. He’s fulfilled half of the promise that he made to Jun at the festival, the fake IDs a necessity to get into any club worth getting into. The next holiday on Nova should be interesting since he’s known the other Dark long enough to understand that she always cashes in on favors owed to her. She messes around with the record keepers, though, and that’s the only way to get really decent forged cards from Nova, so even though it means he’ll most likely be spending several nights with her once he gets back, it’ll be worth it. The phone is dropped into a pocket of his messenger bag without a second thought and his tall, narrow frame settles back into the casual lean it had adopted earlier. He’d already gotten a few tips on the good clubs in town, so now it’s a matter of figuring out which one is best for his friend’s first time out and then getting the details in line. Hopefully those IDs wouldn’t take forever to arrive, and honestly he doesn’t really need his since telepathy could easily manipulate the bouncer’s thoughts, but it might be kinda confusing to explain to Jun why his ID says he’s fourteen and isn’t fake. Someone in record keeping could have made it all a hell of a lot easier by just issuing him several identification cards instead of just the one he got. In the end it’s easier to deal with the hassle of getting another one from Nova, even if the methods require owing favors at a later date.
Zeph’s gaze catches the telltale flash of white that he didn’t even really notice he’d been looking for and he watches for a moment while Jun stands with Taz and some of their friends. The other kids all laugh and joke with one another, but his classmate is silent, looking as though he’s only standing there because he doesn’t really know where else to be. Pink eyes suddenly leave their place on the floor to meet midnight from down the hall and the Dark smiles before giving him a little wave. He’s given a slight nod in response before Jun drops his eyes again and even from this distance, Zeph can swear that he can see just the barest flush of red on pale cheeks. The grin on the blonde’s face widens and he pushes from the wall to join the stream of kids heading away from the classrooms, falling almost immediately into a conversation with a group of second years to catch up on the latest gossip…
Jun: Pink colored eyes fall back to their place on the floor a second after he’d somehow managed to meet midnight from across the crowded hall only a moment ago, shifting his head forward a little in an unconscious attempt to cover an odd sort of flush that he can feel washing beneath the surface of his skin. His frown deepens as he stands there amongst his classmates and best friend, wondering what the hell has gotten into him as far as the blonde is concerned. It’s been like this since the festival, a weird sort of almost… happy feeling every time he thinks about his new friend. He can’t figure it out really because the only other person he’s felt this kind of happy about has been Taz. There’s a million reasons he’s touched on- the fact that Zephyr is so open and easy going, the fact that he’s foreign and so all the normal protocols seem to be sort of gone, the fact that he said he actually wants to get to know him, the list goes on and on. But it’s still a little confusing and he doesn’t know why he’s started reacting… weird any time there happens to be a glance thrown his way. He’s a friend, a guy friend and they hung out once just a day ago so it’s not like he has any reason to feel almost embarrassed whenever their eyes meet.
A hard slap on Jun’s back pulls him from his thoughts and he looks up to find silver eyes on him and a single white brow quirked in expectation.
“Yes?” Taz asks and he realizes that he has no idea what the hell had even been asked because he hadn’t been listening at all.
“Um…” he starts, looking around quickly in an attempt to read something, anything on the other student’s faces and only finding a sea of silence while they wait for an answer he’s obviously supposed to give. “I… guess?”
“Then it’s a date.” The white haired Angel grins and a moment later the entire group bursts out in excited banter that Jun feels completely lost for. “See I knew you had it in you. I’ll talk to Ae-Cha and get back to you on a time.”
The snowy haired teen blinks and he starts to protest whatever it is he just agreed to, but before he gets too far his best friend is being snatched up by the arm and one of their classmates is dragging him off into the moving crowd. Jun stands there for only a moment while Taz yells out that he’ll meet him up later and after a few attempts to move after him that fail with the heavy flow of students, he simply gives up and turns to weave his way towards the nearest exit he can find.
Zephyr: The dining hall is more than half empty by the time the blonde Selestarri makes it down from the dorms. A nap after class was definitely more important than making it to dinner at a decent time and besides he had a few other things to follow up on for his first report. Midnight eyes scan the tables automatically and he waves to a couple groups of kids before a flash of white catches his attention. Jun is seated in the far corner of the room, his gaze completely directed at his plate as a pair of classmates chatter away. He’s begun to notice that he’s never really seen the other first year look comfortable while standing around with groups of kids, which he supposes is part of the shyness. During the small amount of time that they’ve hung out while the Dark wasn’t stomping all over the rules of formality, Jun had seemed okay. Still shy and easily embarrassed and all, but that was mostly Zeph’s fault anyway. Aside from himself, it was only with that Angel, Taz, that his friend looked a little less guarded…
Sneakered feet are carrying the tall teenager toward the far table before he even fully realizes it, his telepathy reaching out to nudge the two guys away from Jun’s company just as he slides into the seat across from the silent, white-haired student. Pink eyes don’t lift from the plate on the tabletop at the Dark’s sudden appearance or even as the blonde hands the paper with his dinner request on it to the server. Jun is totally in a world of his own, absorbed by his thoughts and definitely not paying any attention to the dining room. Slowly the Selestarri tilts his head and then body to the side, leaning lower and lower until he finally catches pink with midnight and grins at his friend. “So,” Zephyr teases, straightening up even as scarlet spreads over pale cheeks. “Congratulations are in order, I hear?” Jun blinks and the Dark laughs softly at the mixture of confusion, discomfort, and slight terror on his face, all of which add up to make him look really cute. “The news is pretty much everywhere, but Ae-Cha is definitely one of the cutest girls, so that’s good, right?” Apparently not, because the white-haired teenager still looks really uneasy. He’d heard about it right before walking out of the school that afternoon and the girls are practically bursting with the need to tell everyone they can get near. For whatever reason the news didn’t thrill him, although he’s not sure why the other student going on a date would bother him in the slightest. Hell, he should probably get on that himself to keep his cover all normal and while it’s not an issue with faking interest in one of these humans, there hasn’t really been anyone he’s talked to yet that he wants to go through all the motions and effort with. Jun’s the only one he’s met that he likes hanging around, but it’s kinda obvious with today’s date arrangement that his friend’s interests lie with the girls… Still everyone was so surprised since people have practically been claiming their undying love for the first year student, but he’d turned everyone down until today.
A plate of salad arrives and is set on the tabletop in front Zeph, chopsticks sliding between long fingers in silence. Jun manages a small sip from a cup, the action looking quite wooden and forced, his eyes never moving to meet midnight. Either he’s crazy nervous about this whole thing or something is really wrong. “Seriously, are you all right?” The Dark asks as he lifts a piece of lettuce free from the dish. “I mean, you said you’d go on the date with her, didn’t you?”
Jun: he has no idea how he managed to get himself into this entire mess. Why… why did he say ‘I guess’? And what in the hell is the matter with Taz? He knew he wasn’t listening, he had to because he knows everything about him and he took total advantage of that by roping him into something his best friend knows full well he’d never agree to. God… what is he going to do? There’s no way to get out of it without feelings getting hurt and despite the fact that he wants to blame Taz for this, he really can’t since he should have been paying attention to begin with. This will teach him to float off in his own idiotic little world when he’s standing around with school friends. This should teach him to stand around with them to begin with. God.
And Ae-Cha… he barely knows the girl, he thinks he’s maybe said a whole of two words to her during the entire school year and both of those words were initiated by her. What was Taz thinking setting him up with her? It’s not even like he can call it off because it would cause problems but then going through with the date is going to cause problems anyway since he knows he’ll probably end up hurting the chick’s feelings just by being himself. He doesn’t know what she expects from this but whatever it is… he’s certain he’ll end up disappointing.
Seriously, it’s days like this that he wants nothing more than to be able to crawl into a hole and just never come out again.
The weekend had gone so good too. He’d made a new friend, ditched that stupid party, snuck out and came back without any issues and now… the white haired teenager sighs, so focused in on his thoughts that he doesn’t even notice when the two boys who had been yapping at him have gotten up to leave any more than he notices the blonde sitting down a moment later across the way, now he’s in so much trouble and he doesn’t know what to do.
White gold hair and deep blue eyes slowly fall into view and it’s then that the first year realizes Zephyr is there. He flusters immediately, embarrassed for being so caught up in his thoughts that he hadn’t even seen him there. Jun nods so slightly that it can’t even really be considered a nod as pink eyes fall back down to his plate and a moment later he lifts a single chopstick up without even a thought given to it and begins poking at the untouched food set before him. “Kind of… I guess.” He mutters his response in such a way that it causes Zephyr’s movements to stop, the look he’s being given that of reserved curiosity.
He supposes he did agree, even if he didn’t know at the time that he was agreeing to it and so what can he say beyond ‘yes’ to the other first year? Setting the chopstick down, tapered fingers slide out to push the plate to the side and a moment later he’s setting his elbows against the polished wood while a soft almost exacerbated sound is leaving his lips, tangling those same fingers in snowy strands of feather soft hair. “I wasn’t listening.” He admits quietly as he drops his head just a little more. “Taz set me up and I wasn’t paying attention and I said I’d go on a date with a girl I’ve never even really talked to. I’ve got nothing against her, she’s cute and all, but seriously… I don’t get why everyone is so obsessed with going out with me, I really don’t. I’m a total freak of nature and there’s nothing interesting about me. I’ve got nothing to talk about and there’s nothing I want to say but they all just keep coming at me like I’m something special when I’m not.” And now he’s rambling because he’s freaking out about this entire thing just a little. The last thing he should be doing right now is spilling his guts to Zephyr about it, but now that he’s started, he really can’t find it in him to stop. He’s never been able to talk to anyone besides Taz, really talk and right now he needs to be able to talk something bad. “I really don’t know what to do, I can’t back out because you just… don’t do that but, god… okay… so…” his tone grows so quiet that it might as well be a whisper and even in the near empty dining hall, the tall Selestarri has to strain just to hear, “I’ve never… gone on a date before…with anyone. I don’t even know what I’m supposed to do. What if she wants to hold hands or kiss or something-?” he glances up through strands of white, the panic in his gaze rather clear. “Zephyr, I can’t do that with someone I’m not interested in, I just can’t.”
Zephyr: Midnight eyes blink in surprise at the rush of words from his classmate, unsure for a second what to say when they come to an abrupt stop. This had definitely not been part of his debriefing back on Nova. Nowhere in the description of his assignment had it said anything about helping out friends when they’re having a crisis that causes a meltdown. And this is definitely appearing to be a meltdown. Jun looks so panicked and if they were anywhere but in a school that thrives on formality, he’d be doing what he does back home: hugging his friend and holding him close to reassure him. That doesn’t fly here, though, and he’s about a thousand percent sure that if he were to try it, there’d be some epic level freaking out. Probably best to avoid that, but still he wants to help because the fear he sees in the other teen’s eyes is kinda heartbreaking and it’s not a look that he’s finding he likes seeing there at all.
The Dark sets the piece of lettuce back into the salad bowl and rests the chopsticks against the edge. “Okay… so first, you’re not a freak of nature.” Jun looks like he’s going to argue, but Zeph shakes his head. “Yeah, you’re different and that’s a pain in the ass here, but out in the rest of the world you’d fit right in. Trust me when I say that outside of this place, different is actually a good thing that people work really hard to achieve.” He flashes what he hopes is a reassuring smile before continuing. The more time he spends with his classmate, the more he’s come to realize just how uncomfortable Jun is with his looks. He understands that a lot of that is probably due to the culture, but to him it just makes the other first year all that much more interesting, so maybe he can hope that what he said will sink in a little... “I know that I haven’t been here long, but I think everyone likes to talk with you because you’re cute and you’re never rude or nasty. They know that you won’t turn around and backstab them or spread a bunch of rumors. It’s easy to be drawn to that when the social piranha pack is so vicious, you know? It doesn’t really matter to them that you don’t have much to say.” Deep blue eyes meet pink through long strands of white hair and hold the other teen’s gaze for a brief moment before Jun returns to looking at the table. “That does make you special, Jun, even if you don’t think so.”
Long fingers wrap around the cup of tea that the server must had dropped off while he wasn’t paying attention. The Selestarri takes a long drink while carefully picking out his next words. “So for the date thing…” he sets the cup back on the table, fingertips absently tracing over the delicate pattern. “I mean, you have two options, right? First you can back out and not do it. It’s gonna look bad and feelings are gonna get hurt, but you can still change your mind. But I’m thinking it’ll just cause more of a fuss then there’s already been, you know?” If it wasn’t over the whole school already he’d just erase the chick’s memory of ever liking Jun and that would ease the panic he sees on his friend’s face and get him out of the date, but having to erase everyone in the entire school’s memory is a bit too much. “The second option is to just do it and get it over with. I don’t think it’s the end of the world, having to go somewhere with her once, right? You’re not chained to her for life or anything…”
Okay, he’s not really sure that he’s helping, because Jun still looks pretty freaked… The server comes by and takes the cold food in front of the other first year, but the blonde shakes his head when his plate of salad is reached for, the chopsticks sliding back in between his fingers. The Selestarri’s telepathy nudges the annoying distraction back toward the kitchen, midnight eyes returning to his friend before Zeph continues. “So the kissing and holding hands and stuff,” the pink gaze immediately switches back to the tabletop and either the lighting in this dining room is off or the white-haired first year has turned an even paler shade of white. “I mean, I just think that she’ll be nervous like you are and won’t even really be on about that.” Jun looks as though his fears have been eased about zero percent by his advice, which means he’s probably really fucking this up. He’s never had to deal with anything like this before because his race is so different when it comes to the physical stuff. Holding hands and small kisses are things that start as children when they’re huddled together in the cold of the fortresses. You just grow up used to that closeness and it’s actually kind of expected when you get older. Strangely, though, he finds Jun’s wish not to do anything like that with someone he’s not interested in really sweet. It means that that person would have to be special enough to the other teenager to be gifted with even small things. He’s a bit curious to know what being that kind of special to someone else would feel like… So, when looking at it like that, maybe it would be difficult to just throw a huge turn on everything you’re used to and be all physical, especially in this culture where it seems like touching anyone else even in the most platonic way is strictly forbidden. He’s starting to wonder how they even reproduce…
Chewing thoughtfully on a piece of lettuce, Zephyr lets his gaze refocus on his friend and a smile slowly slips across his mouth as an idea begins to form. “Hey, if you decide to go through with it, would it help if I picked one of her friends so we could double? Maybe there wouldn’t be so much pressure or weirdness if other people were around, you know? Make the best of a bad situation …?”